“The future is not a result of choices among alternative paths offered by the present, but a place that is created - created first in the mind and will, created next in activity. The future is not some place we are going to, but one we are creating.”
Well it certainly has been a long time since I last shared some thoughts on this bloggity blog. The usual demands of work, my classes, life, etc. swallowed up most of my time and did not allow for any time to reflect on life and wax poetic here at the CS Prophet. I truly do plan on writing a lot more often this summer and this initial salvo is intended to catch you all up on where I have been and what has been going on in my life the past few moons. It may ramble at times but I hope there will be one solid theme that comes across…the future and the amazing prospects it holds for all of us.
It was another successful semester at the BSC Newman Center with my students and I feel as if we accomplished a lot of good wherever we went. Some of my students are moving on via graduation or transferring and I will greatly miss them. While I like to think I offer them a good amount of insight into life, faith, and education, they open up my eyes on a daily basis and teach me a great deal as well. They teach me how to be a better man, a better role model, a better campus minister, and most importantly a better human being. All of them, each in their unique way, remind me to hold strong to the Jesuit credo of being a man for others. For those that are leaving us, please stay in touch and know that you will be missed. For those that are returning, hold on tight, the good times are just getting started.
The end of the Spring 2010 semester also saw the completion of my course work for my Master of Arts in Theology degree. This coming year will be chock full of thesis writing and passing my comprehensive exams and then I will finally be a theologian…officially! It was another successful semester and I did well in the class and I am extremely excited to complete my degree. I have been fortunate enough to make some great contacts and I have a few standing offers to teach at local colleges upon the completion of my degree. It is quite flattering to know that people would like me to teach their students and I am confident I would do a great job. For me, there is something surprisingly calming about being in front of a class/audience/group giving a presentation/speech/lesson. I feel at home when I am teaching and enlightening minds and I truly feel blessed to have that ability as one of my gifts in this life. I am always striving to get my name out there and I jump at any chance to speak at colleges, conventions, workshops, etc. In addition to increasing my speaking appearances, I would also like to explore the possibility of freelance writing. I feel as if I could offer good insight if confronted with the appropriate topic and would love to share my musings with a wider audience. If you ever hear of a need for writing pieces on theology, young adult spirituality, travel, food, or many other topics, please let me know!!
As most of you know, one of the biggest changes in my life has come with the moving out of the apartment in North Buffalo and moving home to Clarence. I finally made the decision that I want to save for a house and there was no better time than the present to pull the trigger on that idea. The excitement builds every time I ponder the thought of being a home owner and I know nothing but goodness awaits me in this venture. The past few months have seen great changes to the house at 5115 and I am currently typing away whilst sitting in my new bedroom – if you have ever been to the house, you are in for a shock…it is totally different now…and in a good way!
Without exaggeration, the best thing that has happened to me in a long, long time is the addition of SL in my life. If you are familiar with our story, it is quite the funny one and goes all the way back to the good ol’ days at Canisius (where leaders are made). We were always very friendly, got along great, had many common friends, and pulled off the greatest prank ever on AB. After graduation we parted ways for a number of years – 6 of them with her living in another state – and we did not have much contact…maybe a random e-mail every other year? All of that changed a few months back when a common friend of ours started talking her up to me and suggested we should hang out when she was back in the 716 for a visit. The plan was to have dinner together and possibly meet up with more friends later in the night. Have you ever had that feeling in you when you are just completely sure of something and you don’t really know why? As soon as she walked in the door and I saw her, I just knew…I just knew that she and I were going to get together and be crazy awesome together. I can’t explain why I knew this, but I did. Maybe this was a tad presumptive of me considering we hadn’t even eaten the cheese yet (Cabot seriously sharp cheddar for those scoring at home) but I just had a feeling. We spent all night long – and I do mean ALL night long talking and then we spent the next night together as well. Just catching up and talking for hours and hours and hours. This awesome weekend was followed up by 86…err...84…err, 80 something days (checkout awfulcountdown.com for the correct count) apart. Long story short, we talked every day and made it through to my visit to see her. We spent an even more incredible few days together full of beaches, restaurants, beautiful weather, and rock band and she introduced me to some of her friends who were beyond amazing and completely welcoming. Our friends described our drive back to Buffalo as our “make it or break it moment” and I’m pleased to say we passed with flying colors. I’ve made that drive many times before and that was by far the easiest and most enjoyable of them. So now we’re back in Buffalo together and I can honestly say that I am crazy about this girl. You often hear people say that opposites attract but that certainly isn’t the case for us. We have so many similar interests and the same hysterical sense of humor and that causes me to be completely comfortable and relaxed with her. I can’t even begin to properly put into words how much I enjoy spending time with her and just like being with her. I had gotten to a point where I didn’t know if this was possible and she completely turned that upside down. I may not be able to articulate it well enough here, but I will certainly try to show her how much she means to me by my actions.
I mention SL here because A.) She is super important to me and I am so happy she is in my life and B.) We are going to set the blog world on fire this summer. We have an extremely long list of things we want to do this summer (and beyond) in Buffalo and we want to share our journey with you. Consider it a “1,000 things to see and do in Buffalo before you die” type blog. We will keep you posted along the way and let you know how it all plays out, what you should experience for yourself, and maybe some things to avoid. Check back often because we have already gotten started with the Dave Matthews Band concert at Darien Lake (full review coming in a separate blog) and we’re only getting warmed up.
So what the heck does this all have to do with the future? The future is what you make of it. The future is what you dream of it. If you want it, go out and get it. If you really want something, nothing should stand in your way.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
40 Days to Change the World
In a few short days, Ash Wednesday will be upon us and a new Lenten journey will begin. I was lying in bed the other night unable to sleep, and my mind started wandering and pondering on what I could “give up” for Lent this year. Let’s run through the mental check list, shall we? Candy? Nah, I’m not 12 anymore and I don’t really eat much of it these days. Coffee? That would be a little redundant as I played that game last year. Beer? I did that one a few years ago as well and it seemed like a hugely trivial denial when I thought about it. My thoughts began to wander in a different direction until I had a mini-revelation…although at 2:30 AM, any revelation can be considered a big one. What if I took all of the energy and will power I used each year for giving something up and put it to good use? What if I took the “bad” and turned it into good. That’s when it hit me – 40 Days to Change the World. My plan was hatched and the scheming began immediately – this resulted in another hour of no sleep but it was worth it.
The goal itself is rather simple: Perform at least one act of random kindness each day for the 40 days of Lent. OK, so there are 45 days in Lent this year but everyone remembers Lent as 40 days and that is why I am going with that. This past Sunday at Mass, our community members had a chance to offer up ideas for Lenten kindness. They all received little slips of paper that said, “One act of kindness I suggest as a practice for Lent is…” I will take some of their suggestions and some of YOUR’S as I go through this journey of love in action to make my world a better place for all who live in it. Be sure to add comments here with your ideas of what acts of love and kindness I can perform during Lent. If I inspire along the way and cause others to do acts of random love and kindness, all the better!
There are a few cornerstones to this project that I should discuss a little bit before I go any further…
- To better my world, I must better myself – I like to think that for the most part I am a pretty decent person. I always try to meet the needs of my family and friends (and sometimes strangers) ahead of my own; I am a pretty positive and happy person and I try to encourage others to be positive and happy as well; I try to remember all of the good in my life and never forget the blessings; I’m a loving guy. All that being said, I can still do more. I should still do more. I have been given so much good and it is my responsibility to share that good and encourage that good wherever I go. Acts of kindness and love should not be seen as an obligation but freely given as a fellow human being to all of my brothers and sisters in the world – theologically speaking we are all created in the image and likeness of God, so why am I better than anyone else? I’m not. Everyone deserves a little love and light in their life and I am hoping to be the one to show it to them. A wonderful result of all this giving is that I will in turn become a better person myself and hopefully encourage others along my way. We can all be great and we can all love – social justice isn’t just for rock stars.
- Live simply so others may simply live – This is a motto commonly found connected with alternative spring break programs and service sites around the country. Not that I lead an extravagant life to begin with, but I plan to scale back what I do and how I do it a little more. I have a ridiculously large amount of clothing that I do not wear anymore so that will all be donated to different charity agencies throughout the city. I’m sure there are a number of other things I can do to accomplish this but they are not coming to me right now. I’ll keep you updated.
- Love in action – We all know that love is shown more in deeds than it is in words but there are a few types of love I will be focusing on. “Caritas” is the Latin term for charity and also refers to Christian love. This relates to the good work and good deeds we can do for others. “Agape” is Greek and relates to the love of God. For our usage, we will label it as divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active, and thoughtful love.
- In a perfectly appropriate twist of fate, Holy Week will find me in Baltimore on Alternative Spring Break with my students. I can’t think of a better way to spend my last week of this project – instead of struggling to get to the finish line, we will be building up to a crescendo, reaching the highest point at the conclusion.
I will be offering my thoughts, reactions, struggles, hopes, dreams, experiences, etc. here, so be sure to follow along the journey. 8 days until the adventure begins. I welcome all suggestions and ideas for tasks I should accomplish.
Peace & Love
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
If there's a light in everybody, send out your ray of sunshine.
“It takes a night to make it dawn and it takes a day to make you yawn, brother. And it takes some old to make you young, it takes some cold to know the sun, it takes the one to have the other.” Life is Wonderful – Jason Mraz
I had originally not planned on doing one of these musings, a look ahead to the New Year, if you will. I have never been big on making New Year’s resolutions because I feel like people usually make silly pronouncements that they either have no intention of or no ability to keep. Some of my favorites are: “I will lose 50 pounds this year…I will curse less…I will not eat junk food for an entire year.” While these are all very noble and hopeful, it is not likely that they will come to pass – and let’s be honest, who doesn’t love the occasional chicken wing or ten?? Instead of these lofty goals and plans, why not make smaller, easier to attain goals? Set up a large number of smaller targets that are easier to attain and you will feel awesome once you reach and achieve them. If we aim for grandiose goals and fail, we usually beat ourselves up over it and can’t help but let negativity creep into our psyche, causing us to move further away from where we want to be. However, if we start small and build up our momentum as we pass by the simple benchmarks, our confidence will grow and before we know it we will have reached that once lofty goal. Little by little, piece by piece, bit by bit. That’s all we can really ask of ourselves.
I am constantly trying to improve and grow as a person, so my small goals of this New Year go a little something like this…
Fill the Jar – One of the gifts I received for Christmas this year was a prayer/blessings jar. It is actually quite the incredible idea when I stop and think about it. Because we are a very sensory and tactile oriented culture, we often forget about the things that are not visibly and physically present in front of us. A perfect example of this is all of the blessings in our lives, also known as everyday miracles or even prayers. The concept of this jar is simple. Whenever you think of something that you are thankful or grateful for, feel blessed by, or would like to pray for, you write it down and put it in the jar. My hope for this New Year is an overflowing jar full of thanks and gratitude. I am extremely blessed with so much goodness in my life that it leaves me in awe…I should never forget that. By writing down my random thoughts of thanks, I will certainly become more in tune and cognizant of these blessings in my everyday life.
Pray More – I know this one may seem funny considering what I do for a living but I feel like there is always room for improvement here. I feel that the more aware I become of all the good in my life, the more I need to be offering up prayers of thanksgiving. Ideally I would like to set aside about 10 minutes every day to do this and to just simply “be.” As is true with most of our lives, I am constantly on the go and packing my schedule full of things to do. I rarely take that much needed “me time” and if I am able to set aside a few minutes each day for “me and G time,” I can only benefit by it. Again, I have so much to pray for and so many people to pray for. I am blessed with so many amazing people in my life and I know that they all need certain things as I do, so hopefully my prayers for them can help in some small way. God knows all their prayers for me have helped.
Love – “Because life's too short anyway, but at least it’s better than average. As long as you got me and I got you, you know we’ll got a lot to go around, I’ll be your friend your other brother, another love to come and comfort you. And I’ll keep reminding, if it’s the only thing that I ever do, I will always love you.” Song for a Friend – Jason Mraz
I like to think I am already pretty good at telling those in my life that I love them but I can always tell them more often. We all love to be loved and want to be wanted. It always feels great to hear that you are loved and it feels even better to tell someone you love them – friends, family, lovers, whomever. Like the song says, I am going to try and remind those in my life that I love them. After all, it is the least I can do for all of their help, love, and support over the years. I honestly have no idea where I would be without them.
Spiritual Direction – Something I desperately need to get back in the habit of attending on a regular basis. For those of you who do not know what a spiritual director is, she/he is basically a person who is your spiritual counselor. Ideally you meet once a month and review all that is going on in your life. They are an amazing asset to have because they represent an impartial third party who can listen to you and offer insight while also challenging you to do more and to grow more. I unfortunately have fallen away from this practice due to a crazy schedule of work and finishing my MAT, but I actually need this direction more now than ever in my life. Campus ministry, like many pastoral roles, is a very time consuming job filled with responding to the wants and needs of your students/community members while also trying to provide quality programming for them. It is a job where I am the one listening, helping, offering support and guidance, and simply presence. But who is the person doing that for me? Who is there to listen to me and support me in my pastoral work? This is by no means a knock on my friends and family because they are ridiculously awesome and supportive. I am talking about a person who understands the ins and outs of what I do and can somehow relate to my professional and pastoral experiences while offering insights into my work. I had an amazing spiritual director before but he is now unbelievably busy himself as he is the new rector of the Jesuit residence in Buffalo and just wrapped up the search for a new President at Canisius College. I guess you could say that I am in the market for a new one.
Read More – I am not talking about reading more for work or school (I do plenty of that now) but more for pleasure. I need to make it a goal to explore more my interests and hobbies through books and the amazing insights they can offer. I firmly believe that we can never learn enough and we can never stop growing intellectually, spiritually, and inter-personally. I will not be putting a number on how many books I want to read but I will commit to reading a little bit every night. I was once in the habit of keeping my current book my bed and reading a little, even 5 pages, before bed each night. It is definitely time that I got back into that habit and read more about: Theology, Higher Education, Politics, The restaurant business, Jason Mraz, Dave Matthews Band, American History, Golf, and The Jesuits just to name a few.
Practice Gratitude – “Oh my, the congregation in my mind, is an assembly selling gratitude and practicin’ their lovin’ of you. Live high, live mighty, live righteously.” Live High – Jason Mraz
No matter what is going on in our lives, what we have or do not have, we can always be gracious toward the people we encounter on a daily basis. Dictionary.com defines “gracious” as being “pleasantly kind, benevolent, and courteous” while also adding “merciful or compassionate.” When we define the word that way, it is a pretty awesome thing for us to aspire to. Can you imagine what our world would be like if we were constantly kind, benevolent, courteous, merciful, and compassionate to each other? That would be an unbelievably amazing place to live and love. Obviously the real world is unfortunately not like that, but we can certainly try and make it a better place by our graciousness and gratitude. Aside from this resulting in more gracious people taking over our world (a la pay it forward), it simply puts us in a better mood and a better frame of mind. Aren’t you always in a better mood when you have pleasant interactions with people? Wouldn’t you like that happiness to creep into your entire being? I know I sure would. Even though this sounds simple, it is incredibly difficult to do and definitely requires the baby steps I spoke of earlier. A reasonable goal for this endeavor would be to do one random act of kindness for someone each day for a week. Then try two per day and so on and so on. We have all heard the quote “give until it hurts” but a wise man once told me “give until it feels good…then the giving will become a regular habit because you want the good feelings to stay.” Awesome.
So there you have it – my first take on the new decade and what I hope to be accomplishing in the following year and for the rest of my life. If it gets too hard and you want to quit on your resolutions or goals, think of the movie Finding Nemo – “just keep swimming, just keep swimming.”
Peace and Love.
I had originally not planned on doing one of these musings, a look ahead to the New Year, if you will. I have never been big on making New Year’s resolutions because I feel like people usually make silly pronouncements that they either have no intention of or no ability to keep. Some of my favorites are: “I will lose 50 pounds this year…I will curse less…I will not eat junk food for an entire year.” While these are all very noble and hopeful, it is not likely that they will come to pass – and let’s be honest, who doesn’t love the occasional chicken wing or ten?? Instead of these lofty goals and plans, why not make smaller, easier to attain goals? Set up a large number of smaller targets that are easier to attain and you will feel awesome once you reach and achieve them. If we aim for grandiose goals and fail, we usually beat ourselves up over it and can’t help but let negativity creep into our psyche, causing us to move further away from where we want to be. However, if we start small and build up our momentum as we pass by the simple benchmarks, our confidence will grow and before we know it we will have reached that once lofty goal. Little by little, piece by piece, bit by bit. That’s all we can really ask of ourselves.
I am constantly trying to improve and grow as a person, so my small goals of this New Year go a little something like this…
Fill the Jar – One of the gifts I received for Christmas this year was a prayer/blessings jar. It is actually quite the incredible idea when I stop and think about it. Because we are a very sensory and tactile oriented culture, we often forget about the things that are not visibly and physically present in front of us. A perfect example of this is all of the blessings in our lives, also known as everyday miracles or even prayers. The concept of this jar is simple. Whenever you think of something that you are thankful or grateful for, feel blessed by, or would like to pray for, you write it down and put it in the jar. My hope for this New Year is an overflowing jar full of thanks and gratitude. I am extremely blessed with so much goodness in my life that it leaves me in awe…I should never forget that. By writing down my random thoughts of thanks, I will certainly become more in tune and cognizant of these blessings in my everyday life.
Pray More – I know this one may seem funny considering what I do for a living but I feel like there is always room for improvement here. I feel that the more aware I become of all the good in my life, the more I need to be offering up prayers of thanksgiving. Ideally I would like to set aside about 10 minutes every day to do this and to just simply “be.” As is true with most of our lives, I am constantly on the go and packing my schedule full of things to do. I rarely take that much needed “me time” and if I am able to set aside a few minutes each day for “me and G time,” I can only benefit by it. Again, I have so much to pray for and so many people to pray for. I am blessed with so many amazing people in my life and I know that they all need certain things as I do, so hopefully my prayers for them can help in some small way. God knows all their prayers for me have helped.
Love – “Because life's too short anyway, but at least it’s better than average. As long as you got me and I got you, you know we’ll got a lot to go around, I’ll be your friend your other brother, another love to come and comfort you. And I’ll keep reminding, if it’s the only thing that I ever do, I will always love you.” Song for a Friend – Jason Mraz
I like to think I am already pretty good at telling those in my life that I love them but I can always tell them more often. We all love to be loved and want to be wanted. It always feels great to hear that you are loved and it feels even better to tell someone you love them – friends, family, lovers, whomever. Like the song says, I am going to try and remind those in my life that I love them. After all, it is the least I can do for all of their help, love, and support over the years. I honestly have no idea where I would be without them.
Spiritual Direction – Something I desperately need to get back in the habit of attending on a regular basis. For those of you who do not know what a spiritual director is, she/he is basically a person who is your spiritual counselor. Ideally you meet once a month and review all that is going on in your life. They are an amazing asset to have because they represent an impartial third party who can listen to you and offer insight while also challenging you to do more and to grow more. I unfortunately have fallen away from this practice due to a crazy schedule of work and finishing my MAT, but I actually need this direction more now than ever in my life. Campus ministry, like many pastoral roles, is a very time consuming job filled with responding to the wants and needs of your students/community members while also trying to provide quality programming for them. It is a job where I am the one listening, helping, offering support and guidance, and simply presence. But who is the person doing that for me? Who is there to listen to me and support me in my pastoral work? This is by no means a knock on my friends and family because they are ridiculously awesome and supportive. I am talking about a person who understands the ins and outs of what I do and can somehow relate to my professional and pastoral experiences while offering insights into my work. I had an amazing spiritual director before but he is now unbelievably busy himself as he is the new rector of the Jesuit residence in Buffalo and just wrapped up the search for a new President at Canisius College. I guess you could say that I am in the market for a new one.
Read More – I am not talking about reading more for work or school (I do plenty of that now) but more for pleasure. I need to make it a goal to explore more my interests and hobbies through books and the amazing insights they can offer. I firmly believe that we can never learn enough and we can never stop growing intellectually, spiritually, and inter-personally. I will not be putting a number on how many books I want to read but I will commit to reading a little bit every night. I was once in the habit of keeping my current book my bed and reading a little, even 5 pages, before bed each night. It is definitely time that I got back into that habit and read more about: Theology, Higher Education, Politics, The restaurant business, Jason Mraz, Dave Matthews Band, American History, Golf, and The Jesuits just to name a few.
Practice Gratitude – “Oh my, the congregation in my mind, is an assembly selling gratitude and practicin’ their lovin’ of you. Live high, live mighty, live righteously.” Live High – Jason Mraz
No matter what is going on in our lives, what we have or do not have, we can always be gracious toward the people we encounter on a daily basis. Dictionary.com defines “gracious” as being “pleasantly kind, benevolent, and courteous” while also adding “merciful or compassionate.” When we define the word that way, it is a pretty awesome thing for us to aspire to. Can you imagine what our world would be like if we were constantly kind, benevolent, courteous, merciful, and compassionate to each other? That would be an unbelievably amazing place to live and love. Obviously the real world is unfortunately not like that, but we can certainly try and make it a better place by our graciousness and gratitude. Aside from this resulting in more gracious people taking over our world (a la pay it forward), it simply puts us in a better mood and a better frame of mind. Aren’t you always in a better mood when you have pleasant interactions with people? Wouldn’t you like that happiness to creep into your entire being? I know I sure would. Even though this sounds simple, it is incredibly difficult to do and definitely requires the baby steps I spoke of earlier. A reasonable goal for this endeavor would be to do one random act of kindness for someone each day for a week. Then try two per day and so on and so on. We have all heard the quote “give until it hurts” but a wise man once told me “give until it feels good…then the giving will become a regular habit because you want the good feelings to stay.” Awesome.
So there you have it – my first take on the new decade and what I hope to be accomplishing in the following year and for the rest of my life. If it gets too hard and you want to quit on your resolutions or goals, think of the movie Finding Nemo – “just keep swimming, just keep swimming.”
Peace and Love.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Open The Eyes Of My Heart Lord
This is a first draft of my reflection for the Gospel on Sunday, April 26th that was written a few weeks ago at 1:30 AM. Yes, I am very early, but I will be preaching that day so I wanted to start early.
"With that, their eyes were opened and they recognized him, but he vanished from their sight." These are the words that conclude the Gospel reading today - The road to Emmaus. This story is very near and dear to my heart and I have a strong connection to it. In addition to being one of my favorite Gospel passages, it is the name of the first retreat I attended while at Canisius High School. Emmaus, an experience I will never forget.
Every time I hear this story, I can't help but be perplexed. How did the two travelers not realize they were walking side by side with the risen Christ? We hear that they recount the resurrection story to Jesus and that they long for their savior when He is in fact in their very midst. How could they have been so blind?
But would we be any different? Would we have been able to tell that we were walking with Jesus? In my humble opinion, I think it is no mistake that only one of the travelers, Cleopas, is named - the other left to our imagination. I think the second traveler is unnamed so we can easily insert ourselves into the situation to ponder how we would react.
It's also interesting to note the way Jesus approaches Cleopas and you in the story. There is no Sermon on the Mount, no blinding Transfiguration, no burning bush. Just a simple, plain, ordinary guy walking down the road. The Disciples and all of Jesus' followers were anticipating a glorious return from Him - of course it would have been easy to overlook this man walking to Emmaus.
When are the times in our lives that we have been blinded to God working in our lives? When were the occasions that we were just too busy to slow down and recognize God working in and among us? We have become conditioned to expect immediate gratification in our society - Fast food, 8 minute abs, and now DVR where we don't even need to sit through commercials anymore because we can fast forward through them. We need to slow down, take a few deep breaths, and listen to our lives speaking to us. We need to be attentive to the people we interact with and the events that play out on a daily basis. We might just hear the answers to our prayers.
Students will often ask me if their prayers are answered and I like to say there are three answers we can receive from God: (1) yes, (2) No, and (3) Not now. And that third answer is the hardest for us to deal with because it usually doesn't happen according to our schedule. And worse yet, if we're too busy, we can miss the answer completely and think we got a "no." Surprisingly enough, the movie "Evan Almighty" starring Steve Carrell has some amazing theological points in it. In response to a question regrading prayer Morgan Freeman, who plays the role of God, tells the person his take on prayer. He says: When a person prays for strength, does God give them strength or the opportunity to be strong? if they pray for courage, does God give them courage or the opportunity to be courageous? if they pray for love, do they get love, or the opportunity to be loving?
How many times have we been blinded to Jesus walking with us? How many times will you now take the extra moment to see God in all things - to appreciate God's active and loving role in your life?
With that, our eyes were opened and we recognized him, but He vanished from our sight.
"With that, their eyes were opened and they recognized him, but he vanished from their sight." These are the words that conclude the Gospel reading today - The road to Emmaus. This story is very near and dear to my heart and I have a strong connection to it. In addition to being one of my favorite Gospel passages, it is the name of the first retreat I attended while at Canisius High School. Emmaus, an experience I will never forget.
Every time I hear this story, I can't help but be perplexed. How did the two travelers not realize they were walking side by side with the risen Christ? We hear that they recount the resurrection story to Jesus and that they long for their savior when He is in fact in their very midst. How could they have been so blind?
But would we be any different? Would we have been able to tell that we were walking with Jesus? In my humble opinion, I think it is no mistake that only one of the travelers, Cleopas, is named - the other left to our imagination. I think the second traveler is unnamed so we can easily insert ourselves into the situation to ponder how we would react.
It's also interesting to note the way Jesus approaches Cleopas and you in the story. There is no Sermon on the Mount, no blinding Transfiguration, no burning bush. Just a simple, plain, ordinary guy walking down the road. The Disciples and all of Jesus' followers were anticipating a glorious return from Him - of course it would have been easy to overlook this man walking to Emmaus.
When are the times in our lives that we have been blinded to God working in our lives? When were the occasions that we were just too busy to slow down and recognize God working in and among us? We have become conditioned to expect immediate gratification in our society - Fast food, 8 minute abs, and now DVR where we don't even need to sit through commercials anymore because we can fast forward through them. We need to slow down, take a few deep breaths, and listen to our lives speaking to us. We need to be attentive to the people we interact with and the events that play out on a daily basis. We might just hear the answers to our prayers.
Students will often ask me if their prayers are answered and I like to say there are three answers we can receive from God: (1) yes, (2) No, and (3) Not now. And that third answer is the hardest for us to deal with because it usually doesn't happen according to our schedule. And worse yet, if we're too busy, we can miss the answer completely and think we got a "no." Surprisingly enough, the movie "Evan Almighty" starring Steve Carrell has some amazing theological points in it. In response to a question regrading prayer Morgan Freeman, who plays the role of God, tells the person his take on prayer. He says: When a person prays for strength, does God give them strength or the opportunity to be strong? if they pray for courage, does God give them courage or the opportunity to be courageous? if they pray for love, do they get love, or the opportunity to be loving?
How many times have we been blinded to Jesus walking with us? How many times will you now take the extra moment to see God in all things - to appreciate God's active and loving role in your life?
With that, our eyes were opened and we recognized him, but He vanished from our sight.
Monday, December 15, 2008
A Life of Pages Waiting to be Filled
" A heart that's hopeful, a head that's full of dreams. But this becoming, is harder than it seems. Feels like I'm looking for a reason, roaming through the night to find my place in this world."
-- Michael W. Smith "Place In This World"
This past October, I was on retreat with my students and they posed a few questions to me that were repeated a number of times: "What am I supposed to do with my life?" "How do I know if I'm following the right path in life?" "How do I discover God's plan for me?" These college students don't mess around. When they have questions, they have BIG questions. In my experience, these are very common thoughts and concerns by young adults but also of people of every age. Finding our own authentic identity is a crucial task of our lives and something that should never be overlooked or oversimplified. I of course do not have all the answers for these questions, but this is my humble attempt at answering life's big questions concerning purpose and vocation.
The poet William Stafford has a great line that says: "Ask me whether what I have done is my life." At first glance it appears to be a silly proposition but if you let it sit with you for a little while it can become much more thought provoking. Of course what I have done is my life - What else would it be? The life that we live on a daily basis does not always mesh with the life that is calling out to us, a life that wants to live in us. Are we doing what we are supposed to be doing? Am I the person I am meant to be? How can I possibly know the answers? The short answer is to simply listen and be aware of what's happening around you on a day to day basis.
In our world of cell phones, iPods, text messages, and instant gratification at the push of a button, we don't have many moments of silence in our lives. Walk down any street some time and notice how many people are talking on their phones, have headphones on, or texting as they walk. My bet is that it will be a rather high number - especially on a college campus. I am not saying there is anything wrong with doing these things (I have a cell, iPod, and I text), but my point is that we do not ever sit back and listen to what is happening around us. Throughout our busy days, we easily miss the subtleties of life that could be the answers to the aforementioned questions. When discussing this idea, I use the metaphor of praying. I truly believe there are three answers to our prayers: yes, no, & not now. The "yes & no" answers are usually easy to see, but it is the "not now" that either gets misconstrued as a "no" or is not even recognized as such. I have never heard the voice of God literally answering my prayers, but I have noticed interactions with people and various events that occur in my life that serve to function as my answers. But if we do not listen carefully or pay attention to the minutiae, we will miss much. As odd as it may sound, there are actually some wonderful theological reflections in the movie "Evan Almighty." In the movie, Morgan Freeman plays the role of God and discusses prayer and answers to prayer. He says: "When we pray for mercy, are we given mercy or the chance to be merciful? When we pray for courage, are we given courage or the chance to be courageous? When we pray for love, are we given love or the opportunity to be loving?" I think that idea can be applicable in our lives, but if we do not pay attention, we will miss those opportunities.
Vocation follows a similar path - listening to our lives and figuring out what our lives are truly about. The word vocation is always assumed to mean something of a religious nature, but it goes far beyond that. We all have a vocation waiting to be uncovered. The word vocation itself is rooted in the Latin for "voice." It is not merely a goal to be pursued, but a calling that needs to be listened to and heard. We need to figure out who we are before we can attempt to realize what we are meant to do with the life we have been given. We cannot hope to find our own identity by trying to be someone else or forcing a standard of living on to ourselves. We must recognize our individual and unique personhood and respond to that (which can take the course of a lifetime). There is an old Hasidic story that illuminates the importance of becoming ourselves: Rabbi Zusya, when he was an old man, said, "In the coming world, they will not ask me: Why were you not Moses? They will ask me: Why were you not Zusya?" We all have special gifts and talents given to us at birth that are waiting to be found and used. So now the question of "What am I supposed to do with my life?" is replaced with "Who am I?"
"The test of a vocation is the love of the drudgery it involves" -- Logan Pearsall Smith
The 19th century Polish poet Cyprian Norwid spoke of purpose in life as well. "To be what is called happy, one should have (1) something to live on, (2) something to live for, (3) something to die for. The lack of one of these results in drama. The lack of two results in tragedy." By our nature, humans need to feel as if they belong to something, that they are needed, and that they are able to contribute to something greater than their own life. This is often addressed by believing in something with great passion and excitement that causes us to dedicate our whole heart to its pursuit. This idea is summed up the idea of Noble Purpose. William Damon describes this idea in his book by the same name and states that the word noble does not need to mean heroic as it often is, but it can be found in mundane familiar acts or our everyday pursuits - another example of listening to our lives! Damon goes on to say that the definition of purpose in systematic research is "a stable and generalized intention to accomplish something both meaningful to the self and of consequence to the world beyond the self." There are two important things to bear in mind at this juncture: (1) Purpose is a goal, but it is of a loftier ideal than simple desires or materialistic goods and (2) Purpose is integral to our personal search for meaning in life but should have an external quality that is the desire to make a difference in the world - to move beyond our own self-interest. Helen Keller said "Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose."
So back to the original questions of "What am I supposed to do with my life?" and "How do I know if I'm following the right path in life?" Find something that brings you happiness, joy, and that you truly love to do and run with it. Every single pursuit and purpose in life can be a noble one and there is no telling how are lives and actions will positively affect others. What we may deem as meaningless can be completely meaningful for another. Finally, recognize that our life's purpose may not ever be fully achieved, and that's OK! As long as we are constantly striving for it, learning, growing, loving, and sharing ourselves and our gifts, we are definitely on the right path.
"Everyone can be great, because everyone can serve." - Martin Luther King Jr.
-- Michael W. Smith "Place In This World"
This past October, I was on retreat with my students and they posed a few questions to me that were repeated a number of times: "What am I supposed to do with my life?" "How do I know if I'm following the right path in life?" "How do I discover God's plan for me?" These college students don't mess around. When they have questions, they have BIG questions. In my experience, these are very common thoughts and concerns by young adults but also of people of every age. Finding our own authentic identity is a crucial task of our lives and something that should never be overlooked or oversimplified. I of course do not have all the answers for these questions, but this is my humble attempt at answering life's big questions concerning purpose and vocation.
The poet William Stafford has a great line that says: "Ask me whether what I have done is my life." At first glance it appears to be a silly proposition but if you let it sit with you for a little while it can become much more thought provoking. Of course what I have done is my life - What else would it be? The life that we live on a daily basis does not always mesh with the life that is calling out to us, a life that wants to live in us. Are we doing what we are supposed to be doing? Am I the person I am meant to be? How can I possibly know the answers? The short answer is to simply listen and be aware of what's happening around you on a day to day basis.
In our world of cell phones, iPods, text messages, and instant gratification at the push of a button, we don't have many moments of silence in our lives. Walk down any street some time and notice how many people are talking on their phones, have headphones on, or texting as they walk. My bet is that it will be a rather high number - especially on a college campus. I am not saying there is anything wrong with doing these things (I have a cell, iPod, and I text), but my point is that we do not ever sit back and listen to what is happening around us. Throughout our busy days, we easily miss the subtleties of life that could be the answers to the aforementioned questions. When discussing this idea, I use the metaphor of praying. I truly believe there are three answers to our prayers: yes, no, & not now. The "yes & no" answers are usually easy to see, but it is the "not now" that either gets misconstrued as a "no" or is not even recognized as such. I have never heard the voice of God literally answering my prayers, but I have noticed interactions with people and various events that occur in my life that serve to function as my answers. But if we do not listen carefully or pay attention to the minutiae, we will miss much. As odd as it may sound, there are actually some wonderful theological reflections in the movie "Evan Almighty." In the movie, Morgan Freeman plays the role of God and discusses prayer and answers to prayer. He says: "When we pray for mercy, are we given mercy or the chance to be merciful? When we pray for courage, are we given courage or the chance to be courageous? When we pray for love, are we given love or the opportunity to be loving?" I think that idea can be applicable in our lives, but if we do not pay attention, we will miss those opportunities.
Vocation follows a similar path - listening to our lives and figuring out what our lives are truly about. The word vocation is always assumed to mean something of a religious nature, but it goes far beyond that. We all have a vocation waiting to be uncovered. The word vocation itself is rooted in the Latin for "voice." It is not merely a goal to be pursued, but a calling that needs to be listened to and heard. We need to figure out who we are before we can attempt to realize what we are meant to do with the life we have been given. We cannot hope to find our own identity by trying to be someone else or forcing a standard of living on to ourselves. We must recognize our individual and unique personhood and respond to that (which can take the course of a lifetime). There is an old Hasidic story that illuminates the importance of becoming ourselves: Rabbi Zusya, when he was an old man, said, "In the coming world, they will not ask me: Why were you not Moses? They will ask me: Why were you not Zusya?" We all have special gifts and talents given to us at birth that are waiting to be found and used. So now the question of "What am I supposed to do with my life?" is replaced with "Who am I?"
"The test of a vocation is the love of the drudgery it involves" -- Logan Pearsall Smith
The 19th century Polish poet Cyprian Norwid spoke of purpose in life as well. "To be what is called happy, one should have (1) something to live on, (2) something to live for, (3) something to die for. The lack of one of these results in drama. The lack of two results in tragedy." By our nature, humans need to feel as if they belong to something, that they are needed, and that they are able to contribute to something greater than their own life. This is often addressed by believing in something with great passion and excitement that causes us to dedicate our whole heart to its pursuit. This idea is summed up the idea of Noble Purpose. William Damon describes this idea in his book by the same name and states that the word noble does not need to mean heroic as it often is, but it can be found in mundane familiar acts or our everyday pursuits - another example of listening to our lives! Damon goes on to say that the definition of purpose in systematic research is "a stable and generalized intention to accomplish something both meaningful to the self and of consequence to the world beyond the self." There are two important things to bear in mind at this juncture: (1) Purpose is a goal, but it is of a loftier ideal than simple desires or materialistic goods and (2) Purpose is integral to our personal search for meaning in life but should have an external quality that is the desire to make a difference in the world - to move beyond our own self-interest. Helen Keller said "Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose."
So back to the original questions of "What am I supposed to do with my life?" and "How do I know if I'm following the right path in life?" Find something that brings you happiness, joy, and that you truly love to do and run with it. Every single pursuit and purpose in life can be a noble one and there is no telling how are lives and actions will positively affect others. What we may deem as meaningless can be completely meaningful for another. Finally, recognize that our life's purpose may not ever be fully achieved, and that's OK! As long as we are constantly striving for it, learning, growing, loving, and sharing ourselves and our gifts, we are definitely on the right path.
"Everyone can be great, because everyone can serve." - Martin Luther King Jr.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Lord, I Am Not Worthy To Receive You...
While recently spending a day at the Abbey of the Genesee, home of the Trappist Monks (www.geneseeabbey.org), I picked up a copy of "On Living Simply" by John Chrysostom. Chrysostom was an outspoken opponent of the new found power and wealth held by bishops and clergy in 312 AD after Emperor Constantine made Christianity the official religion of his vast empire. Chrysostom urged the clergy to return to the practices of Christ's life and teachings, such as generosity and living simply. Literally meaning "golden-mouthed," Chrysostom delivered many sermons on the themes of economic and social justice. In my estimation, his sermons were an amazingly prophetic base for Catholic Social Teaching which arrived almost 1,500 years after him. The book contains upwards of 80 excerpts from some of his surviving sermons and they are just as relevant today as they were in his life. I would like to share a passage with you and then offer up some of my own thoughts on it.
"When we live according to the moral principles of our faith, those around us may respond in three possible ways. First, they may be so impressed by the example of our goodness, and so envious of the joy which it brings, that they want to join us and become like us. That is the response which we most earnestly desire. Second, they may be indifferent to us, because they are so bound up with their own selfish cares and concerns; although their eyes may perceive our way of life, their hearts are blind, so we are unable to stir them. Third, they may react against us, feeling threatened by our example and even angry with us; thus they will cling even more firmly to their material possessions and selfish ambitions, and slander us at every opportunity. Naturally, we dread this type of reaction, because we want to live in peace with our neighbors, regardless of their personal beliefs and values. But if no one reacts to us in this way, we must wonder whether we are truly fulfilling the commandments of Christ."
After my initial reading of this passage, I had thoughts of humility, pride, and self-righteousness running through my mind. I was not sure of their connection to the passage at face value, but I let these words simmer for a little while. After a time of contemplative reflection, it all started to make sense to me. I started to review parts of my life and especially my work in campus/pastoral ministry and I wanted to see how I fit into the three categories listed by Chrysostom. While I have specific thoughts on each of the three responses, one part of my lifestyle and ministry is woven into all of them. I have never been one to push my faith, religion, theology, spirituality, or morality on anyone. I am of course always willing to share or offer advice when asked for it, but you will never see me holding signs or shaking Bibles at people outside of a Bills' game. You all know the people I'm talking about - The doomsdayers who offer up thoughts of "repent now! the end is near" or other scare-tactic theologies as I like to call them - the shock value approach that they hope will inspire people to stop and be saved. That just isn't my style at all. I like to keep it much more low-key and let my friends or even complete strangers seek me out. Encounters with strangers actually happen far more often than you might think as I am inundated with questions or concerns as soon as people find out what I do. I also never to profess to have all of the answers. I have firm beliefs and ideas on many things, but I feel it is out of my league to know 100% of what God thinks on certain subjects. I always wondered how televangelists like Benny Hinn could have the market cornered on God's innermost thoughts and proclamations. How can he be so sure that he has the accurate take on something? Does he have a direct line to God similar to that of the Bat Phone? That would be cool. But I don't have that luxury, that direct line to God. So I remain rather reserved and humble in my thoughts and statements toward others. That is why I titled this blog The Curbside Prophet. It is my way of letting people know that I will willingly meet them in any situation they are in. For better or worse, I will always be there for you, even if it means going into the gutter. Like all of humanity, many people have times of trouble or doubt and they need someone to be there to help guide them. I want to be that guy. I will simply live my life and go wherever God takes me. It reminds me of a time during my Junior year at Canisius College. One of my roommates girlfriends was asking me questions about religion and the Bible and she eventually got to this one: "Bill, doesn't your religion tell you to go out and preach the words in the Bible to people?" I answered affirmatively, but I told her that I do it by my actions and how I live my life. It is just like the old saying, "actions speak louder than words." I truly believe that if I lead a good life and set a good example for others, they will believe that far more than any spoken word coming from my mouth. How many times have you seen a super devout Christian quoting Scripture and preaching in the church but acting like a total jerk on Monday? People are always watching us, waiting for us to trip up so they can lob hypocrite grenades at us as if they get some perverse pleasure out of showing our flaws. I know I use it all the time, but it is more appropriate now than ever. My favorite quote is by Brennan Manning: "The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians, who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable."
So back to the first response: people are impressed by our goodness and envious of our joy, so they want to join us. Sounds good and all but I personally struggle with a few of Chrysostom's words, goodness and envious. Goodness itself is a word that is hard to define. It is not always black and white, easy to distinguish between good and bad. Depending on where you are from or the culture you are raised in, you have different ideas of what is good or bad. But let's stick to goodness in terms of someone's life - my life. Do I like to think I lead a good life? Of course I do. But I try and avoid language of good or bad when speaking of my life in comparison to others. I never want someone to think I am judging them or even worse, have them get the impression that I think I am better than they are. That is not my call, not my decision. I also have trouble with his use of envious in this first response. I struggle with it because I don't want people to be envious or jealous of me (I'm not saying anyone is, I'm merely speaking in generalities) or my life. Chrysostom almost speaks of envy in a positive light and I don't see it that way. I want people to be happy in their own skin and in their own life.
The third response offered by Chrysostom is rather extreme and I'm not sure if I have ever encountered it before. It seems to me that those reactions and responses may be directed at a self-righteous person who is loud and obnoxious in their personal profession of faith; possibly someone who helps others just to be seen and lauded for their "charity." This makes me think of the Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector (Luke 18:9-14). "He then addressed this parable to those who were convinced of their own righteousness and despised everyone else. “Two people went up to the temple area to pray; one was a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee took up his position and spoke this prayer to himself, ‘O God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of humanity – greedy, dishonest, adulterous – or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole income.’ But the tax collector stood off at a distance and would not even raise his eyes to heaven but beat his breast and prayed, ‘O God, be merciful to me a sinner.’ I tell you, the latter went home justified, not the former; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” I must admit, if I heard someone talking about how great and holy they were like the Pharisee was, I would be completely turned off. Now I can see how people would respond like Chrysostom was talking about. Think about how the Pharisee acted for a moment. His entire prayer is about himself. He thanks God – not for blessings – but that he isn’t a sinner like others. He also reminds God of how pious he is (fasting and tithing). The Pharisee thought that all he needed to do to gain God’s favor was to keep all the rules. He didn’t think about the possibility that God might want him to come with an attitude of unworthiness and need. I hope and pray I can continue with the spirit of the tax collector. Notice the tax collector’s posture. He is standing at a distance, feeling unworthy to draw close to God or the temple. He does not raise his eyes to heaven, but stands with his head bowed, as a sign of his sense of guilt. His prayer is remarkable and short. Instead of telling God all the good things about himself, he describes himself as a sinner. He makes no excuses for the behavior, and asks for mercy. The tax collector makes a great contrast in his attitude to himself and to God. He is well aware of his shortcomings and does not imagine that he could possibly be acceptable to God. But that does not stop him from asking for forgiveness. This showed a much better understanding than the Pharisee of what God is really like. The tax collector knows that no matter how bad we are and what we have done, God is still wanting us and willing to forgive us, if we are able to accept the forgiveness.
Being better than others is not what matters most to God. The prayer of the tax collector is very similar to the prayer of the Mass, “Lord, I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and I shall be healed.”
"When we live according to the moral principles of our faith, those around us may respond in three possible ways. First, they may be so impressed by the example of our goodness, and so envious of the joy which it brings, that they want to join us and become like us. That is the response which we most earnestly desire. Second, they may be indifferent to us, because they are so bound up with their own selfish cares and concerns; although their eyes may perceive our way of life, their hearts are blind, so we are unable to stir them. Third, they may react against us, feeling threatened by our example and even angry with us; thus they will cling even more firmly to their material possessions and selfish ambitions, and slander us at every opportunity. Naturally, we dread this type of reaction, because we want to live in peace with our neighbors, regardless of their personal beliefs and values. But if no one reacts to us in this way, we must wonder whether we are truly fulfilling the commandments of Christ."
After my initial reading of this passage, I had thoughts of humility, pride, and self-righteousness running through my mind. I was not sure of their connection to the passage at face value, but I let these words simmer for a little while. After a time of contemplative reflection, it all started to make sense to me. I started to review parts of my life and especially my work in campus/pastoral ministry and I wanted to see how I fit into the three categories listed by Chrysostom. While I have specific thoughts on each of the three responses, one part of my lifestyle and ministry is woven into all of them. I have never been one to push my faith, religion, theology, spirituality, or morality on anyone. I am of course always willing to share or offer advice when asked for it, but you will never see me holding signs or shaking Bibles at people outside of a Bills' game. You all know the people I'm talking about - The doomsdayers who offer up thoughts of "repent now! the end is near" or other scare-tactic theologies as I like to call them - the shock value approach that they hope will inspire people to stop and be saved. That just isn't my style at all. I like to keep it much more low-key and let my friends or even complete strangers seek me out. Encounters with strangers actually happen far more often than you might think as I am inundated with questions or concerns as soon as people find out what I do. I also never to profess to have all of the answers. I have firm beliefs and ideas on many things, but I feel it is out of my league to know 100% of what God thinks on certain subjects. I always wondered how televangelists like Benny Hinn could have the market cornered on God's innermost thoughts and proclamations. How can he be so sure that he has the accurate take on something? Does he have a direct line to God similar to that of the Bat Phone? That would be cool. But I don't have that luxury, that direct line to God. So I remain rather reserved and humble in my thoughts and statements toward others. That is why I titled this blog The Curbside Prophet. It is my way of letting people know that I will willingly meet them in any situation they are in. For better or worse, I will always be there for you, even if it means going into the gutter. Like all of humanity, many people have times of trouble or doubt and they need someone to be there to help guide them. I want to be that guy. I will simply live my life and go wherever God takes me. It reminds me of a time during my Junior year at Canisius College. One of my roommates girlfriends was asking me questions about religion and the Bible and she eventually got to this one: "Bill, doesn't your religion tell you to go out and preach the words in the Bible to people?" I answered affirmatively, but I told her that I do it by my actions and how I live my life. It is just like the old saying, "actions speak louder than words." I truly believe that if I lead a good life and set a good example for others, they will believe that far more than any spoken word coming from my mouth. How many times have you seen a super devout Christian quoting Scripture and preaching in the church but acting like a total jerk on Monday? People are always watching us, waiting for us to trip up so they can lob hypocrite grenades at us as if they get some perverse pleasure out of showing our flaws. I know I use it all the time, but it is more appropriate now than ever. My favorite quote is by Brennan Manning: "The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians, who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable."
So back to the first response: people are impressed by our goodness and envious of our joy, so they want to join us. Sounds good and all but I personally struggle with a few of Chrysostom's words, goodness and envious. Goodness itself is a word that is hard to define. It is not always black and white, easy to distinguish between good and bad. Depending on where you are from or the culture you are raised in, you have different ideas of what is good or bad. But let's stick to goodness in terms of someone's life - my life. Do I like to think I lead a good life? Of course I do. But I try and avoid language of good or bad when speaking of my life in comparison to others. I never want someone to think I am judging them or even worse, have them get the impression that I think I am better than they are. That is not my call, not my decision. I also have trouble with his use of envious in this first response. I struggle with it because I don't want people to be envious or jealous of me (I'm not saying anyone is, I'm merely speaking in generalities) or my life. Chrysostom almost speaks of envy in a positive light and I don't see it that way. I want people to be happy in their own skin and in their own life.
The third response offered by Chrysostom is rather extreme and I'm not sure if I have ever encountered it before. It seems to me that those reactions and responses may be directed at a self-righteous person who is loud and obnoxious in their personal profession of faith; possibly someone who helps others just to be seen and lauded for their "charity." This makes me think of the Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector (Luke 18:9-14). "He then addressed this parable to those who were convinced of their own righteousness and despised everyone else. “Two people went up to the temple area to pray; one was a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee took up his position and spoke this prayer to himself, ‘O God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of humanity – greedy, dishonest, adulterous – or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole income.’ But the tax collector stood off at a distance and would not even raise his eyes to heaven but beat his breast and prayed, ‘O God, be merciful to me a sinner.’ I tell you, the latter went home justified, not the former; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” I must admit, if I heard someone talking about how great and holy they were like the Pharisee was, I would be completely turned off. Now I can see how people would respond like Chrysostom was talking about. Think about how the Pharisee acted for a moment. His entire prayer is about himself. He thanks God – not for blessings – but that he isn’t a sinner like others. He also reminds God of how pious he is (fasting and tithing). The Pharisee thought that all he needed to do to gain God’s favor was to keep all the rules. He didn’t think about the possibility that God might want him to come with an attitude of unworthiness and need. I hope and pray I can continue with the spirit of the tax collector. Notice the tax collector’s posture. He is standing at a distance, feeling unworthy to draw close to God or the temple. He does not raise his eyes to heaven, but stands with his head bowed, as a sign of his sense of guilt. His prayer is remarkable and short. Instead of telling God all the good things about himself, he describes himself as a sinner. He makes no excuses for the behavior, and asks for mercy. The tax collector makes a great contrast in his attitude to himself and to God. He is well aware of his shortcomings and does not imagine that he could possibly be acceptable to God. But that does not stop him from asking for forgiveness. This showed a much better understanding than the Pharisee of what God is really like. The tax collector knows that no matter how bad we are and what we have done, God is still wanting us and willing to forgive us, if we are able to accept the forgiveness.
Being better than others is not what matters most to God. The prayer of the tax collector is very similar to the prayer of the Mass, “Lord, I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and I shall be healed.”
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Theology of Golf
(Reprinted with permission. Copyright 2007 - Bill Vaughan)
During one of my countless rounds of golf this past summer, I found myself standing on the first tee waiting for the sun to warm the new day. The way the sunrays kissed the dew of the fairway and illuminated the beautiful landscape really got me thinking. For me, this was as real of a spiritual experience as one can have. My brain was immediately flooded with words, thoughts, phrases, and images to describe the experience; to describe any spiritual experience. I was amazed at how many of these easily crossed over to describe a high quality golf game. During that round I could not shake the thoughts and they have been nagging at me like a puppy with A.D.D. ever since. This blog is something I have flirted with writing for the longest time now. Finally, I am happy to offer my first attempt at putting those thoughts, feelings, and emotions into written form.
I truly believe that the sport of golf has a deep theological/spiritual connection to it. There are a number of tools required to be a successful golfer and many of them can be found in spirituality/religiosity. A few of these being: commitment, patience, unconditional confidence, focus, determination, an ability to take the good with the bad, honesty, integrity, respect for self and others, care for the course/creation, and a calm in the face of distraction, just to name a few. In no particular order at all I will aim to dissect these qualities (and others) as they relate to both spirituality and golf.
Golf is the truest of gentlemen’s games and separates itself from the rest of sports for a number of reasons. No matter if you are a 27 year-old hacker or a seasoned tour pro, you are responsible for counting your strokes and keeping your own score. This quality of the game just cries out for honesty and integrity. Will you count every stroke on the hole, or will you give yourself par when in reality you lipped-out for bogey? Unless you are playing in a highly competitive environment, nobody is watching you and keeping track of your shots. How easy it would be to fudge the score a little! But what good does that do? You are only fooling and lying to yourself. You will know if you truly are as good as your scorecard says you are. My father used to give me great lessons on character when I was growing up. He used to say that true character is “what you do when nobody else is watching.” He would also tell me, “if you can look in the mirror every morning and be happy with what you see, then you are an honest man building good character.” I think it is quite obvious how these qualities cross over into the spiritual realm. I of course am in no position to judge a person or their character, but I think we can all agree that someone with a lot of integrity and honesty has good character. We do not often associate criminals or mean-spirited people as high character individuals. After eight years of Jesuit education, it is easy for me to tell you that a truly religious or spiritual person has integrity and is honest. I’m clearly not saying that religious or spiritual people are the only ones able to obtain these characteristics, but I am saying that you will indeed find them in each religious/spiritual person.
Patience is absolutely key to a good golf game. You simply cannot pick up the clubs for the first time and expect to shoot par. Similarly, if you only play a few rounds a year, you should not expect to see much improvement in your game. I have been playing golf for twelve years now and I am finally confident in saying that I am a “moderately decent-kind of good-not terrible-ok golfer.” This game requires practice, practice, and more practice. You cannot expect to be good unless you play a lot. Practicing the same shot two hundred times in a row is not something many people would be able to do on a daily basis. I myself may not have the patience for such a feat, but the really good golfers, the ones who make any sacrifice to improve, are able to be this patient. Patience in regard to prayer is also essential. I can’t tell you how many times in my six-plus years of working in pastoral ministry I have heard “God doesn’t answer my prayers.” I like to respond to that by informing the person that God does always answer our prayers, sometimes just not to our liking. I believe that there are three simple answers to our prayers: yes, no, and not now. The “not now” answers are always the hardest to deal with. In a world where we expect everything as quick as possible, we are not accustomed to having to wait for an answer. If we do not get our answer on our timetable, we dismiss it as God not answering another prayer. But did we take the time to shut-up, slow down and listen? We are constantly bombarded with iPods, cell phones, radio, and television. When do you take the time to be still and listen? Maybe if you had the patience to do just that, you would hear your answers more often.
Another hugely important element to a good golf game is unconditional confidence. You have to absolutely believe in yourself and know that you will make the shot you want. If you are standing over a five-foot putt and wondering how you will mess it up (which I have done countless times), chances are you aren’t making that putt. But if you approach that very same putt knowing you will make it, chances are very good that putt is going in. Beyond his physical abilities, it is no surprise that Tiger Woods is far and away the best golfer in the world. He is so mentally strong when he is on the golf course that nothing will knock him off track. Sure, he may be upset with himself for a moment, but he is able to shake it off and move on to the next shot, fully confident he will do exactly what he wants. Of course, this unconditional confidence can be extremely liberating in your day-to-day life as well. Once you reach a point in your life where you know are able to handle anything that comes your way, regardless of the circumstances, you have attained that confidence. I personally believe that this confidence and this ability comes directly from God. Even when I think the obstacle is far too large to ever overcome, it is comforting to me to know I have the Big Guy on my side and will always have my back. I have faith and trust in God to lead me through anything in life. Which sets up nicely for……
An ability to take the good with the bad. The cool thing about golf is that you get 18 chances to do something great. Sure, some holes you will do well on and others you will drop an 8 on your card. But if you don’t let that snowman get you down you have an immediate opportunity to do well again. This goes back to the mental aspect of the game. If you don’t let a bad shot or hole get you down, you can have good things in your future. Each hole, like every day in our lives, is a new challenge and has its own unique obstacles to overcome. If you are able to shake off a bad day at work and go into the next day with a positive attitude, you are more likely to see the good in the day. Another common thing I hear from college students is “It’s easy to see and recognize God’s presence in the good times, but not so much in the bad.” This is very understandable, and I don’t have all of the answers for them, but I do encourage them to “find the beauty in ugly.” No matter how bleak you think something may look, take another glance and find the positive. I am touching on the idea of patience again. Take your time, analyze what is really happening and find the positive. This may seem like wishful thinking to some, but to quote Nurse Roberts from Scrubs, “If I didn’t believe there was a higher purpose to all of this, I wouldn’t be able to come to this hospital every day.” There is so much negativity in this world that if I didn’t always look for the good, I would go insane. Maybe that’s just the eternal optimist in me.
You can never play enough. You can never pray enough.
Nothing drives me crazier on a golf course than missing a putt because some inconsiderate #$%! has messed up the green. Since I am a poor man, I am not able to enjoy the benefits of a country club golf course. On the public courses I play, the greens are not taken care of very well. People scuff up the greens with their spikes, do not repair marks from their ball on the green (which quickly causes that part of the green to die), do not replace divots (which quickly causes that part of the fairway to die), and they don’t rake sand traps. All of these factors cause terrible headaches and hazards for the people playing behind them, let alone the grounds crew who is on the course before the sun comes up. If people would be respectful and considerate of the course and other people, it would save a lot of time in the long run. The connection here is a care for our world in general, and I think that is pretty obvious. Obvious enough to allow me to move on to my next point.
Human beings are inherently communal creatures. While it can be quite peaceful to play a round of golf alone, it is always more fun to play with your friends (especially if you golf with some of the characters that I do). Again, I think the connection is quite obvious here. Why do you think we worship as a large community at Mass on Sundays? St. Irenaeus said “The glory of God is man fully alive.” In my mind, people are more fully alive when they are with family, friends, or even complete strangers. We are social beings, we are not meant to be alone!
Finally, a good golf game requires commitment and dedication. There were a few mornings when Joe and I teed off with sub-freezing temperatures and most normal people were still warm in their beds. But we love to play so much that we would do anything and brave any conditions to get on the course. On Saturday nights when my friends are going out and having fun, there is always a huge urge to go and party with them. But I know that if I do that, the chances of me being to work (read: church) at 8:30 the next morning are not very good. That is just a sacrifice I gladly make in my life. Just like Joe and I being so cold that we could not feel our hands. Some sacrifices need to be made to get the most out of it.
So there you have it. The Theology of Golf Part I. You don’t have to agree with all that I said, this is just my take on it. Much peace to you all.
During one of my countless rounds of golf this past summer, I found myself standing on the first tee waiting for the sun to warm the new day. The way the sunrays kissed the dew of the fairway and illuminated the beautiful landscape really got me thinking. For me, this was as real of a spiritual experience as one can have. My brain was immediately flooded with words, thoughts, phrases, and images to describe the experience; to describe any spiritual experience. I was amazed at how many of these easily crossed over to describe a high quality golf game. During that round I could not shake the thoughts and they have been nagging at me like a puppy with A.D.D. ever since. This blog is something I have flirted with writing for the longest time now. Finally, I am happy to offer my first attempt at putting those thoughts, feelings, and emotions into written form.
I truly believe that the sport of golf has a deep theological/spiritual connection to it. There are a number of tools required to be a successful golfer and many of them can be found in spirituality/religiosity. A few of these being: commitment, patience, unconditional confidence, focus, determination, an ability to take the good with the bad, honesty, integrity, respect for self and others, care for the course/creation, and a calm in the face of distraction, just to name a few. In no particular order at all I will aim to dissect these qualities (and others) as they relate to both spirituality and golf.
Golf is the truest of gentlemen’s games and separates itself from the rest of sports for a number of reasons. No matter if you are a 27 year-old hacker or a seasoned tour pro, you are responsible for counting your strokes and keeping your own score. This quality of the game just cries out for honesty and integrity. Will you count every stroke on the hole, or will you give yourself par when in reality you lipped-out for bogey? Unless you are playing in a highly competitive environment, nobody is watching you and keeping track of your shots. How easy it would be to fudge the score a little! But what good does that do? You are only fooling and lying to yourself. You will know if you truly are as good as your scorecard says you are. My father used to give me great lessons on character when I was growing up. He used to say that true character is “what you do when nobody else is watching.” He would also tell me, “if you can look in the mirror every morning and be happy with what you see, then you are an honest man building good character.” I think it is quite obvious how these qualities cross over into the spiritual realm. I of course am in no position to judge a person or their character, but I think we can all agree that someone with a lot of integrity and honesty has good character. We do not often associate criminals or mean-spirited people as high character individuals. After eight years of Jesuit education, it is easy for me to tell you that a truly religious or spiritual person has integrity and is honest. I’m clearly not saying that religious or spiritual people are the only ones able to obtain these characteristics, but I am saying that you will indeed find them in each religious/spiritual person.
Patience is absolutely key to a good golf game. You simply cannot pick up the clubs for the first time and expect to shoot par. Similarly, if you only play a few rounds a year, you should not expect to see much improvement in your game. I have been playing golf for twelve years now and I am finally confident in saying that I am a “moderately decent-kind of good-not terrible-ok golfer.” This game requires practice, practice, and more practice. You cannot expect to be good unless you play a lot. Practicing the same shot two hundred times in a row is not something many people would be able to do on a daily basis. I myself may not have the patience for such a feat, but the really good golfers, the ones who make any sacrifice to improve, are able to be this patient. Patience in regard to prayer is also essential. I can’t tell you how many times in my six-plus years of working in pastoral ministry I have heard “God doesn’t answer my prayers.” I like to respond to that by informing the person that God does always answer our prayers, sometimes just not to our liking. I believe that there are three simple answers to our prayers: yes, no, and not now. The “not now” answers are always the hardest to deal with. In a world where we expect everything as quick as possible, we are not accustomed to having to wait for an answer. If we do not get our answer on our timetable, we dismiss it as God not answering another prayer. But did we take the time to shut-up, slow down and listen? We are constantly bombarded with iPods, cell phones, radio, and television. When do you take the time to be still and listen? Maybe if you had the patience to do just that, you would hear your answers more often.
Another hugely important element to a good golf game is unconditional confidence. You have to absolutely believe in yourself and know that you will make the shot you want. If you are standing over a five-foot putt and wondering how you will mess it up (which I have done countless times), chances are you aren’t making that putt. But if you approach that very same putt knowing you will make it, chances are very good that putt is going in. Beyond his physical abilities, it is no surprise that Tiger Woods is far and away the best golfer in the world. He is so mentally strong when he is on the golf course that nothing will knock him off track. Sure, he may be upset with himself for a moment, but he is able to shake it off and move on to the next shot, fully confident he will do exactly what he wants. Of course, this unconditional confidence can be extremely liberating in your day-to-day life as well. Once you reach a point in your life where you know are able to handle anything that comes your way, regardless of the circumstances, you have attained that confidence. I personally believe that this confidence and this ability comes directly from God. Even when I think the obstacle is far too large to ever overcome, it is comforting to me to know I have the Big Guy on my side and will always have my back. I have faith and trust in God to lead me through anything in life. Which sets up nicely for……
An ability to take the good with the bad. The cool thing about golf is that you get 18 chances to do something great. Sure, some holes you will do well on and others you will drop an 8 on your card. But if you don’t let that snowman get you down you have an immediate opportunity to do well again. This goes back to the mental aspect of the game. If you don’t let a bad shot or hole get you down, you can have good things in your future. Each hole, like every day in our lives, is a new challenge and has its own unique obstacles to overcome. If you are able to shake off a bad day at work and go into the next day with a positive attitude, you are more likely to see the good in the day. Another common thing I hear from college students is “It’s easy to see and recognize God’s presence in the good times, but not so much in the bad.” This is very understandable, and I don’t have all of the answers for them, but I do encourage them to “find the beauty in ugly.” No matter how bleak you think something may look, take another glance and find the positive. I am touching on the idea of patience again. Take your time, analyze what is really happening and find the positive. This may seem like wishful thinking to some, but to quote Nurse Roberts from Scrubs, “If I didn’t believe there was a higher purpose to all of this, I wouldn’t be able to come to this hospital every day.” There is so much negativity in this world that if I didn’t always look for the good, I would go insane. Maybe that’s just the eternal optimist in me.
You can never play enough. You can never pray enough.
Nothing drives me crazier on a golf course than missing a putt because some inconsiderate #$%! has messed up the green. Since I am a poor man, I am not able to enjoy the benefits of a country club golf course. On the public courses I play, the greens are not taken care of very well. People scuff up the greens with their spikes, do not repair marks from their ball on the green (which quickly causes that part of the green to die), do not replace divots (which quickly causes that part of the fairway to die), and they don’t rake sand traps. All of these factors cause terrible headaches and hazards for the people playing behind them, let alone the grounds crew who is on the course before the sun comes up. If people would be respectful and considerate of the course and other people, it would save a lot of time in the long run. The connection here is a care for our world in general, and I think that is pretty obvious. Obvious enough to allow me to move on to my next point.
Human beings are inherently communal creatures. While it can be quite peaceful to play a round of golf alone, it is always more fun to play with your friends (especially if you golf with some of the characters that I do). Again, I think the connection is quite obvious here. Why do you think we worship as a large community at Mass on Sundays? St. Irenaeus said “The glory of God is man fully alive.” In my mind, people are more fully alive when they are with family, friends, or even complete strangers. We are social beings, we are not meant to be alone!
Finally, a good golf game requires commitment and dedication. There were a few mornings when Joe and I teed off with sub-freezing temperatures and most normal people were still warm in their beds. But we love to play so much that we would do anything and brave any conditions to get on the course. On Saturday nights when my friends are going out and having fun, there is always a huge urge to go and party with them. But I know that if I do that, the chances of me being to work (read: church) at 8:30 the next morning are not very good. That is just a sacrifice I gladly make in my life. Just like Joe and I being so cold that we could not feel our hands. Some sacrifices need to be made to get the most out of it.
So there you have it. The Theology of Golf Part I. You don’t have to agree with all that I said, this is just my take on it. Much peace to you all.
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